| Not "feeling the love" that is supposed to | | | | invitation to connect. If you're lucky, |
| come from networking on sites like LinkedIn? | | | | they'll just ignore you. Multiple times. Your |
| You're not alone! It's not easy to "get | | | | feelings might get hurt, but at least you |
| connected" successfully regardless of how | | | | won't score any penalty points. |
| many people tell you LinkedIn is the holy | | | | |
| grail of professional networking. | | | | If you are thinking of adding them to your |
| | | | network, make no assumptions. Test the waters |
| Here's how to minimize residual damage to | | | | offline before issuing an invitation to |
| your self-confidence and sense of worth when | | | | connect to be on the safe side. |
| they're just not that "LinkedIn" to you. | | | | |
| | | | In the middle is everyone else. They may or |
| 1. It's Not Who You Know, It's Who Knows You! | | | | may not know you but, if you can get up the |
| | | | courage to send an invitation to connect, |
| LinkedIn advises connecting only with those | | | | there is a 50/50 chance they'll accept if for |
| you know and trust. Which is great if you | | | | no other reason than you look like someone |
| know a lot of people. Not so great if you're | | | | they really should know (or at least give the |
| looking to meet new folks to expand your | | | | appearance of knowing) or because they |
| network which is how most people are "sold" | | | | actually do know you and have decided to give |
| on the system and why they are using it to | | | | you that "virtual seal of social approval". |
| begin with. | | | | Others may accept because they have an agenda |
| | | | of their own to pursue and you look like |
| Who needs another time-consuming networking | | | | someone they can safely approach with it |
| tool to stay connected with people you | | | | sooner or later. |
| already know? You have a relationship with | | | | |
| them and probably keep in touch regularly via | | | | Then there are the people who send you an |
| other ways and means. | | | | invitation to connect with them. Now you get |
| | | | to decide who's in and who's out. What's your |
| Don't be surprised if you find people you | | | | standard "acceptance" criteria going to be? |
| know on LinkedIn, issue an "invitation to | | | | |
| connect", then don't hear back from them. If | | | | 3. Make a More Memorable First Move! |
| you look closely, you may find they set up | | | | |
| their profile a long time ago, never did much | | | | You can approach people you don't know on |
| of anything with it, and aren't all that | | | | LinkedIn but if you just send the boilerplate |
| active in LinkedIn anyway (if at all). Not | | | | text provided for an invitation to connect |
| much of a problem then. | | | | don't expect many acceptances. Send a |
| | | | personal message; give them a reason to want |
| What is a problem is when these same people | | | | to connect. You'll be much more successful. |
| respond to your invitation with a "Doesn't | | | | |
| know" tag. Get enough of these and LinkedIn | | | | 4. Tell a Better Story! |
| will ban you forever. Ouch! | | | | |
| | | | Just how "attractive" are you on screen? |
| 2. It's Not Who You Know, It's Who WANTS to | | | | LinkedIn is not a "meet market" for |
| Know You! | | | | professional socializing. In fact, they only |
| | | | recently started letting members post photos |
| LinkedIn has a defined social hierarchy. | | | | on the site. But don't expect to see much |
| Don't act surprised. Every society has a | | | | "action" in the networking game if you |
| "pecking order"; this one just happens to be | | | | haven't put much effort into your web |
| online. | | | | presence. |
| | | | |
| At the top of the hierarchy is the "open | | | | Your professional profile tells a story about |
| networkers". They call themselves LIONS (for | | | | your connection worthiness. You still have to |
| LinkedIn Open Networkers). They typically | | | | "sell" yourself if you want to make decent |
| have hundreds, if not thousands of | | | | connections; your "rejection" percentage will |
| connections and advertise their openness to | | | | be high if you don't do a good job of it. |
| connecting with anyone. This does not mean | | | | |
| you don't have to check their profiles; your | | | | 5. Go for Group Gold! |
| "invitation to connect" can still be | | | | |
| rejected. But it does mean chances are good | | | | Does your profile read virtual wallflower? |
| they'll accept thereby making it possible for | | | | Check to see if you meet the criteria of |
| you to grow your network by connecting to | | | | specific groups or associations. Then make |
| them. The downside is you're not likely to | | | | group connections and display your badge of |
| have a lot in common with a LION (unless | | | | acceptance (group label) on your profile. |
| choosing them wisely) which could make | | | | Depending on the label, your "connection" |
| building ongoing relationships harder. | | | | attractiveness could increase many times |
| | | | over. |
| At the bottom of the hierarchy are the | | | | |
| "closed networkers". These folks accept | | | | When using social networking tools like |
| invitations to connect based on | | | | LinkedIn don't take anything that happens or |
| highly-defined known-only-to-themselves | | | | doesn't happen in cyber-space personally. We |
| criteria. Approaching them is very risky. | | | | all hunger for belonging, acceptance, |
| Even when you know them, worked with them, | | | | validation and love; it's just more |
| and possibly are even close personal friends | | | | productive to look for these things in places |
| with them, they still might reject your | | | | other than online. |