| It's one of those things that all parents want to | | | | them what to do, when to do it, where to go, and |
| provide for their children and one of those things that | | | | more. When children are allowed to make some |
| many feel they do not know how to do: raise a | | | | choices, even if it's something small, they learn to be |
| self-confident child. Self-esteem oftentimes seems | | | | self-reliant. You don't want your children growing up |
| like a fragile, distant thing that we all know what it is | | | | feeling dependent on others for direction. Simple |
| but don't know how to develop. Your self-esteem is | | | | choices such as what to wear (you can offer two or |
| a compilation of how you feel about yourself. It | | | | three choices) or choosing a special lunch item will |
| encompasses everything from your confidence in | | | | foster your child's being able to think independently. |
| relationships, to your body image, to your work life. | | | | Encourage your children to try new things. While |
| So how do you foster this "thing" in your children? | | | | there's nothing wrong with encouraging your child's |
| We teach our children "honesty is the best policy." | | | | talents--this will help build self-confidence as well--it's |
| This applies to how we deal with our children as | | | | also important that your children learn to experiment. |
| much as it does expecting them to be honest with | | | | Trying new things helps everyone overcome fears of |
| us. When it comes to your child's self-esteem, he or | | | | the unknown and helps us learn to deal with success |
| she will know or be able to sense if you are not | | | | and failure. |
| being honest. For example, if art is not your child's | | | | If a child never learns to try new things, this can |
| top skill, don't say that his or her drawing is the best | | | | create problems later in life. |
| you've ever seen. Your child will know it's not, and will | | | | After all, most people do not live in world where |
| not believe you the next time you say something | | | | everything is the same day after day. Life is |
| meant to be positive, no matter how honest it is. | | | | constantly changing, whether it's a move to a new |
| Instead, tell your child something genuine about the | | | | city or starting a new career. If children are |
| piece or the effort. Make non-judgmental statements | | | | experienced at trying new things, even if small, life's |
| such as, "You really used your imagination in making | | | | bigger transitions will be much easier--such as leaving |
| the flowers many different colors." This simply states | | | | for college and starting a career. |
| your observation, rather than a false statement. | | | | These are, of course, only a few things you can do |
| Also, understand that your child and your child's | | | | to help develop your child's self-confidence. The |
| behavior are two separate things. This can be very | | | | important thing to remember is that it is an ongoing |
| hard to remember, particularly when your child is | | | | process. The little things do add up, even if they |
| acting out in ways that make you crazy or that are | | | | seem unimportant. This can be helpful to keep in |
| unsafe. However, when you discipline your child for | | | | mind, particularly when something as important as |
| the behavior rather than the person, you can | | | | developing your child's self esteem feels like a |
| positively influence and foster self esteem. Why? If | | | | monumental task. It doesn't have to be! Taking time |
| your child feels that you are mad, because of who | | | | to recognize your child for the wonderful person he |
| he or she is as a person rather than for the behavior, | | | | or she is, combined with a few techniques and |
| this can negatively affect your child's self-esteem. | | | | consistency will go a long way toward raising a |
| Using "I" statements helps with this. Say something | | | | healthy, confident adult. |
| like, "I don't like it when you leave your toys | | | | Learn proven techniques to reinforce self-esteem and |
| scattered all over the floor," which also addresses | | | | self-confidence to design and live an extraordinary |
| the behavior, rather than, "You are a slob," which | | | | life; for you, your family, your children and teens. |
| attacks their character. | | | | Discover keys, tips and secrets to raise your own |
| Let your child make some decisions. Children are in a | | | | self-esteem by promoting self-esteem in others. |
| situation where everyone else is constantly telling | | | | |